Weddings make my brain explode. I was just reading about addressing and monogram etiquette. Apparently, having our return address spelled out as "Chris & Laura," which I did, was incorrect (as was having our names appear on the back of the envelope at all, according to some). Bride's name is supposed to come first. That means that on any favors, etc I have to put "Laura & Chris," which doesn't look nearly so nice in the font I'm using. In fact, it throws the ampresand off in a peculiar spacing way.* Meanwhile, also apparently the man's first name should never be separated from his surname. So does that mean writing "Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Smith" was wrong? You wouldn't put "Mrs. and Mr. Jane and John Smith." And I don't like "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith" because that's eliminating the woman, for pete's sake.
I did have one invite where I didn't use Mr. and Mrs. because the couple each took each other's name so I wasn't sure if they would want Mr. and Mrs. Ironically, I guess that one is the most correctly addressed of them all: Jane and John Doe Smith.
I'm sure my one grandmother is going to have a cow about all of the above, but whatever.
*I mean, do I? Have to print it that way, I mean? OK to throw tradition to the wind? On the other hand, I don't want to break [any more] rules. I can't believe after a week of expending brain cells on stamps--seriously, the USPS saga is way too boring to write about, let's just say by the end of this week Chris and I will have between us a total of four visits to various Manhattan post offices--that now I'm worrying about whose name goes first. I can't wait to not think about this anymore.
Update. We didn't use an inner envelope, we didn't list our parents' names on the invitations, we didn't include a reception card: I think it's safe to say that etiquette can shove it, regardless of what I decide for any future paper products.